The Club for Alec
by KiwiBirdieOfTheAbyss
Summary: Isabelle, Clary and Jace all decide to make Alec straight for the purpose of him not telling his parents. So where exactly is the best place to go? LOLEO!


**I couldn't help but think of something like this. It's actually kind of hilarious to think of it this way!! Tell me what you think. M for the "stripper club" part!  
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"Come on Alec, you big baby!" Isabelle said, her eyes glittering at him as if this was the last thing that should've happened.

"Izzy, I—I don't know about this . . ." Alec stuttered, looking around him. The club they were at was nothing like they'd ever seen before. The lights flashed around, a lot like Pandemonium, but there were poles everywhere, and ladies dancing around, "Izzy, you know that I—I'm, you know . . ."

"Of course," she snorted, "I know my own brother well enough! It's just, you could fix that problem, maybe, if you found out you liked girls . . ."

Alec stopped dead, staring at Isabelle as if she were crazy. She stopped, turning to see why he wasn't following. Her black hair flung as she turned, "What?" she asked.

"You think that by watching . . ." he gulped, " . . ._strippers_ . . . that I'm going to like girls all of a sudden?!"

"Well, Alec, there's nothing else I can do, now is there?" she huffed, obviously taken aback, "I mean, it would mean that you would be, you know, _straight_, and you wouldn't have to worry about telling Mom or Dad anything, I don't know, _out of the ordinary!_"

"Izzy!" he complained, trying to turn around and stalk back out, "I can't do this!"

"Like, 80% of people aren't really p_ermanently_ gay! Just, you know, give it a try!" Isabelle suggested, grabbing his arm, and yanking him towards the bunches of dancing girls. He gulped as one slid closer to him, trailing her hands across his chest.

"So?" Isabelle asked, "What do you think?"

"Ew, Izzy, I'm disgusted! Can we _please_ get out of here?" Alec complained, trying to wipe off the imaginary line that the stripper had drawn on his clothes.

"You might like that, but you're not showing it," Isabelle objected, shoving him further into the crowd, "You're my brother, I'm trying to help you!"

"Stop, I don't need any help!" he objected, trying to push past her.

"So help me I will get out my whip if I have to and tie you here!" Isabelle growled, "Alec, just give it a try!"

"Jace would _love_ this," Alec muttered under his breath, "so much for a helpful sister."

"_What_ did you say?!" she hissed into his ear as another dancer came up, trailing her fingers across his cheek this time. He shuddered involuntarily. He'd take Magnus any day over this.

"Nothing," he said back, "Just that _Gilligan's Island_ is sounding pretty good right now!"

Isabelle snorted, "Fine, let's go then." He thought he heard her say something else, but it was lost in the crowd. Once they were outside, he thought he heard, " . . .better idea next time, Clary!"

"Clary was in on this?!" he asked, his mouth gaping open.

"Well, she _did_ figure out you were gay on her own," Isabelle snapped, stalking off towards the institute.

"You guys were conspiring against me?!" Alec growled, preparing to launch himself at her.

"Calm down, Jace was in on it too!" she laughed, walking with her high heels clicking. Alec hurried to catch up.

"Jace would never—he couldn't possibly—why are you _doing this to me?_" Alec stuttered.

"Alec, it's not my fault. Everyone decided to help you become straight, and well, this is how it came out. This seemed like a logical way to, uh, turn you," Isabelle said, not meeting his eyes.

"So this was your idea?" Alec asked, his temper rising.

"Actually, Jace wanted to escort you there to make it seem like he wanted you to come along with him, but we all know he'd get caught up with some _girl_, and you'd be pretending to have fun," Isabelle shrugged her shoulders.

"You guys are _so_ gonna get it when we get home," Alec snapped as Izzy hailed a cab. They rode in silence, Alec letting his steam roll off and Isabelle texting away at her phone.

"What are you doing?" Alec asked. He couldn't let his curiosity dissipate as easily as his temper.

"Uh, nothing," she said, shielding her phone from view.

"Let me see!" he said, yanking at her hand.

"No!" she said, pulling back. Alec snatched it away, looking at the text that was just waiting to be sent.

_Great idea, guys! You better run for your lives, though. He's pretty pissed . . ._

"You're warning them about me?!" he asked, incredulous.

"It's only fair!" she pouted, taking her phone back, "You would probably strangle Clary, even if you wouldn't do that to Jace . . ."

"What on Earth do you think I am?" Alec snapped, "Some kind of toy that can just be reversed?"

"Hey, kids," the cab driver growled from the front, "Quit the yapping while I can still hear!"

"You're right," Alec whispered menacingly to Isabelle, "They just won't expect to find that you'll be the first one."

"I'm so scared," Isabelle stated sarcastically.

Alec snorted, "I'll just have to find someway to get back at you, then. Only then, we're even."


End file.
